You don't have to look very far to see someone express anger at Christians for doing something wrong, hurting their feelings, or betraying them in some way. Some days, all you have to do is log on to Facebook.
Some of this anger toward Christians is unwarranted. Sometimes, people are angry at what Christians stand for, and thus express that anger toward them. Some feel convicted of their sin, and justify it by saying the Christian is "judging them," or being "legalistic" or "hypocritical." But we'd be naive to think that Christians never sin, and Christians never hurt people.
In Genesis 16:1-13, we read about a woman named Hagar, who wound up in a world of hurt because of the actions of Abraham and Sarah.
God promised Abraham and Sarah a son, but they were old, and beyond childbearing years. So, Sarah devises a plan to have her children through her servant, Hagar. Back in those days, it was a custom that a woman could use her handmaid as a surrogate... to have children by having the handmaid have children with her husband. Hagar, a handmaid, has no say in this.
This situation causes problems. Sarah's plan, in spite of the custom of the day, was still sin. Customs and cultures do not excuse sin. This sin leads to problems between Sarah and Hagar, and it leads to hardships for Hagar.
Through reading Genesis 16, we see that even God's people mess up. Abraham and Sarah were Godly people. They lived their lives following God. They are listed in the Hebrews Hall of Fame in Hebrews 11. Some theologians have even suggested that their actions with Hagar were acts of faith. (Sarah was trying to deliver the promised son). However, what they did to Hagar was still sin. It violated God's plan for marriage (one man-one woman), and Hagar wasn't even given the option.
Now look at the level of Hagar's victimization. She's a slave. She has nothing. She has no rights. She is an Egyptian, which means she is in a foreign country serving foreign owners. Now, she even loses control of her body. Once she does have a son, he will be taken away and given to Sarah (or at least, that was the plan). When things go south, Hagar is treated harshly (Genesis 16:6)
Sometimes, Godly people hurt you. They might have good intentions, but they still hurt you. (Sometimes the intentions weren't good, but it still hurts.)
Sin always causes problems. Genesis 16:4 says "And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes." Hagar conceived a child by Abraham, and despised Sarah for it. Her anger toward Sarah led to disrespect toward Sarah, which led to problems in Abraham and Sarah's relationship, and led to Sarah dealing harshly with Hagar... to the point that Hagar had to flee.
Sin destroys peace, relationships, and lives. It creates chaos, discord and conflict.
When people hurt you, even when Godly people hurt you, God sees it. Hagar fled from Sarah, and the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water. The LORD told Hagar to go back to Sarah, and submit to her, and make amends. He then tells her that He has heard her affliction, and made promises concerning her son.
Genesis 16:11 says "And the angel of the LORD said unto her, behold, thou art with child, and shalt bear a son, and shall call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction." God's message to Hagar was that He heard her affliction, and He was going to work it out for her. That's why God wanted her to go back, so He could work it out for her.
God hears our afflictions. He knows what we struggle with, what hurts us, who hurts us, and He will work those things out for us. We need to allow Him to work. We need to trust Him to work.
In Genesis 16:13, Hagar responds by saying "Thou God seest me... have I also here looked after Him that seeth me?" Hagar realizes that God sees her, and that gives her reason to trust and obey Him. God is watching, God will protect, God will avenge, God will care for you.
God is real, He's living, He interacts with us. That is why we should trust Him. That is why we should obey Him.
Healing begins with forgiveness, and forgiveness begins when we take the first steps. Forgiveness simply means that you will no longer hold the person who hurt you accountable. Forgiveness is an act of faith, because you are trusting God to take care of you, to protect you, and to deal with the one who hurt you. Trust God to do that.
Hagar returned home to Sarah, and life sort of went back to normal for a while, before Abraham and Sarah had their own son. After that, an incident involving Ishmael and Isaac would lead to Hagar and Ishmael getting kicked out. Even after that, God provided for Hagar, and Abraham even continued to visit and care for her and Ishmael.
A bad experience doesn't have to end in a dark hole. It can end in a light of faith in the Lord, forgiveness and healing. Which path will you choose?
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